But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Randomize
