So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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