Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
