I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
