yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Randomize