at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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