its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
This is classic penis vs brain.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Randomize
