You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Randomize