the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
I will be naked everywhere
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
