I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Randomize
