There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
