Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
