Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Found the puke drawer
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
