Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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