For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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