My brain says no but my pants say off.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Randomize
