why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
