i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
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