Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Randomize