Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize
