Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
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