spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I'm both gender and math confused
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
