Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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