So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
