i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Randomize