Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
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