bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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