I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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