i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
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