..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Randomize
