okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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