i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize