you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
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