So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
she peed on how many people?
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
