dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize