he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
The air taste purple.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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