so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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