Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
