I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize
