Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
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