Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize