love makes seman taste better
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I need to sanitize my soul.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
