WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
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