I would go down on you faster than GM stock
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize
