True but thats because hes a fetus.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
