Screwed.edu
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
