similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
