I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
