If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
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