would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Randomize
